Dear Diary from a sister

Dear Diary, I decided to pick you up so I can write and express myself completely. I hope I can confide in you again, I hope I can still trust you? I write in tears. Remember the last time I wrote to you, I was so excited and blushed all through I typed each word....the feeling is gone, I feel completely empty, I feel helpless. 

Dear Diary, you know after that break up, you remember yea? The one where I resolved to give a chill for a while before allowing the butterflies get to me again? Yes,that one, so I kept to it for a while, though I met a few I was to try and experiment but sincerely, I just wasn't ready. Months gone by and then I met a friend who happens to be my Ex,hmmm......long story. We met and immediately, I felt that butterflies, I was super excited, it came all natural, it felt new, it felt like I was presented an award, at the time we met again, I couldn't remember anything that happened between us, I mean what caused the break up. That was when I wrote to you telling you how happy I was again. It's been weeks and months of happiness, forgiveness, openness, sincerity,faithfulness,laughter, sweet emotions....just think of the good stuff. This last week has been the most memorable week this year, it's been one trip to the other, it just feels good having someone to care for me and love me genuinely, someone who understands my every reaction, facial expression, someone who knows me in and out, someone who respects and adores me. Dear Diary, I can go on and on, but sadly, all these will come to a slow motion in two weeks. He will be travelling to the U.S in two weeks for his masters and probably get a job and reside there. It hurts like crazy. Although there's not been any talks on dating but I just hate that this happy feeling will be over in just a twinkle of an eye. 

Dear Diary, I read and hear about how people fall in love and how happy they are, I just experienced it again and just when I decided within myself to be happy with this, then there goes the trip. I feel really sad, I caught myself crying but i've been praying to get over this and be strong. I totally have forgotten how it is to be loved till I allowed this and now....

Dear Diary, i'm happy I have you to talk to, thank you so much.